Start Your Date Off Right By Putting Her At Ease
The best way to start a date is by putting your date at her ease. You don’t need to be Casanova, but you should be able to make a girl feel glad she’s out with you instead of home alone. That’s not exactly the endgame of most guys, but it’s a good thing to aim for when you’re starting a first date out on the town with a hookup.
It can be difficult to make a woman forget that she’s out with a strange guy, but you want to get yourself out of the category of “stranger” as fast as possible. The easiest way to do that is by making sure she feels relaxed, happy, content around you.
Here are our some of our tips to get laid for making sure she doesn’t see you as a “blind date,” but as a potential hookup.
Dinner is a great idea.
A lot of hookup sites will tell you not to take a hookup to dinner. They say that it just makes girls think you want more of a relationship, or that it makes girls too comfortable, or it lasts too long, or whatever.
That would have some merit, but women are people. They’re not just slot machines you put coins in to get sex out. For a quality hookup, you’re probably going to want to spend a little more time together than it takes her to toss back a few shots.
Dinner is a great place to talk. You can always talk about the food if you can’t think of anything else, and this can be a GREAT way to get pre-sex jitters out of your system and hers.
Stay away from movies and clubs.
For a second or third date, a movie or a club can be great!
However, think about the fact that you won’t be able to talk at a movie or club. At best, you’re sitting next to a stranger, dancing with a stranger, etcetera. At worst, you could get this girl back to your place and find out only then that’s she’s kind of terrible. Like, deal breaking terrible. Yes, there ARE girls so horrible we won’t sleep with them (and whoever told you different was lying).
A movie is a fun third date. Don’t pick it until you’re sure you want to spend two hours next to this girl possibly holding her hand. You don’t know that she’ll want to make out, and she probably doesn’t on the first date.
A club can be a lot of fun, but it’s not a very exclusive kind of fun. You run the very real risk of this girl finding someone who’s a better flirt or a better dancer, and that’s NOT why you came to a hookup site.
Stick to places you can talk for the first date. You want to know a little about her before you try to seal the deal, and believe us, she wants to know about you, too. A guy that picks somewhere his date can’t talk is a guy she won’t be comfortable going home with.
Let her know where you want to end up—before you start the date.
Yes, we’re advocating that you let her know the endgame before you even show up. Don’t be shocked—this can be a great way to make sure she’s at her ease before you start dinner!
You don’t have to be gross about it, like telling her that the destination is “paradise” or whatever. That’s tacky, and the kind of thing we like to avoid when telling guys how to hook up.
If you’re planning to end up at a hotel, let her know. If you want to go back to your place (not recommended!), let her know that as well. If you want to go to her place, make sure she’s ready.
Here’s a sample message for sending her before the date:
“Hey, I’m psyched about meeting up with you tomorrow. I thought we’d go to Bernadin to start, I love the filet they do. There’s a hotel right up the block, and I got us a room just in case everything goes awesome. See you soon!”
That keeps the pressure off of her, and she already knows what’s going to happen—but she doesn’t feel like you’re bullying her into sex, either. A bad message would be:
“Hey, can’t wait to see you tomorrow! We’ll eat at the Bernadin first, and then go to the hotel to hook up 😉 That’s what we’re both here for after all, so get ready to be impressed!”
So to recap, the three rules for putting her at ease are:
- Take her to dinner.
- Stay away from non-talking dates.
- Let her know where you want to end up.